Feeling Alive...

One day after 911. Long-forgotten memories from 2001 (2001?! Just what is time man?), brought back with the help of a short clip on TV entitled “Today in History”.

We acquire new experiences, and forget the old. Indeed it is tiring to maintain ties, but I’ve learnt since 2005 (2005?! How come it seems such a long time ago since I cried in front of a coffin? Just what is time?) that bonds, once fostered, should never be neglected if they mean something to us.

The innate desire to love and be loved has become a measure of success in my life. The more I can love, the more people feel they need my care, it just thrills me. Perhaps such a definition is unbelievable – to the extent of becoming superfluous, yet every successful attempt at making another person feel anchored back to his/her “normality” just cajoles me to try for more. Of course, any attempts at trying for satiability is, nonetheless, fruitless eventually. But I just want to be here, like a monument neglected in a corner of the soulless park, covered in bird droppings and marred by vandalistic comments like “A loves B”, “F*** C” or “Need sex? Call D at ########”. The passer-by who looks into my eyes that seem to be staring into space will feel me, and that’s how I feel alive.

Living is, after all, about relationships – with Nature, with fellow beings, with God.